The World on Paper

Michelle, an explorer-artist, shares her inspiring story of overcoming anxiety and finding solace in the natural world. Diagnosed with anxiety and panic disorder, Michelle discovered a powerful connection between exploration and artistic expression. Through solo hikes and pilgrimages, she found strength and confidence, transforming her struggles into a source of inspiration for her art. Her story highlights the transformative power of nature, the importance of self-discovery, and the beauty of finding your own path. Michelle's journey encourages aspiring explorer-artists to embrace the outdoors, find their own artistic voice, and use their experiences to create meaningful art that reflects their unique perspective.

Can you tell us about your background? What life was generally like for you growing up?

I grew up in the Perth hills, so I spent my childhood playing in the bush, and back then the Perth hills were considered country. Not a lot to talk about my childhood except I was always drawing and very much into running cross country. I was one of these kids that ran barefoot through the bush on my cross-country races. I truly believed it made me faster.

Something a lot of people don’t know about me is I have (funny enough) Anxiety and Panic disorder. This is something I have lived with for what I had discovered all my life. I never could understand it as I’m a very much a get up and go, not usually scared to step out of my comfort zone person and if you had enough time, I could share with you all the crazy life adventures I have done. Unless I tell people there is not many that would know I have this condition. I didn’t know myself for most my life! I really thought I had some kind of illness that wasn’t being diagnosed. Anyway, as I got older, I started to have more and more attacks and couldn’t work why.

Video by Michelle

As I got worse I would have sometimes up to 3 attacks a day and often resulting in calling friends or an ambulance to help me. Throughout this I still hike and travel overseas often with others as it made me feel safe from my attacks. Do know; however, I have no fear of my surroundings or challenging myself, I am just fearful of having an attack (which makes me worse). It was getting so bad that I ended up spending 3 months hiding in my room absolutely scared to leave. I would take the kids to school then straight back to my room and not come out till I would get my kids then back to my room.

One day I couldn’t take it anymore as it wasn’t who I was! I got really mad at myself and ask what the hell was I doing? Is this my life now? I needed change so I set a goal. My husband knew how much hiking and being in nature helps me, so he suggested I plan a walk like a pilgrimage in Portugal. I had done pilgrimages before but not solo. I agreed and planned it and did mini trips on the Bibbulmun track by myself, trained and within 6 months I was off to do nearly 700 km's in Portugal on my own. I had over the 6 months worked with my Dr and Psychologist on skill sets on how to handle this.

To be honest they couldn’t believe I was going to do something so extreme instead of maybe just something smaller and more local. For me I felt that if I was close to people, it would be far too easy to call on them if I wasn’t coping. I am and always have been a strong stubborn person and this I feel has helped me a lot. Having completed and survived (ha ha) with just a few attacks, not as many as I thought I came home feeling so much stronger and alive. Still got attacks but nothing like it was. I wasn’t home for long, and I decided I needed more. I started researching walks in Australia that I hadn’t done and came across The Lavender Federation Trail. It was a long distance walk, but no one had ever walked it end to end in one go unsupported before, so I made it my mission to do it! I did it! Again, it gave me strength and confidence within myself. I have also completed other trails solo like the Bibbulmun Track E2E and Munda Biddi Trail E2E etc.

How long have you been drawing for?

I have literally been drawing all my life. My Great Grandma was an artist, and my dad was also very artistic so I would say it runs in the family. When I was in school, I was accepted into a Special Art program and then continued with TAFFE. I later had my own studio where I worked as an artist selling my work through commissions, works for display homes, markets, and exhibitions. I also taught art in my studio for ages 5 through to 80.

What do you like to draw/paint?

I do different genres as well as mediums. I am an artist that goes by feeling and what I feel like doing at this moment in time. Just before doing the Australian wildlife in ink, I was doing Zen tangling. I have done many portraits and landscapes, realistic as well as abstract. Many mediums like Acrylic, Watercolour, Pastels, Pencils, you name it. All depends on what I’m feeling or what is inspiring for me now. Often after one of my overseas hikes I would come back and create a piece of art depicting where I have been or seen.

Tell me about your journey as an explorer-artist. How did you discover the connection between exploration and your artistic inspiration?

Having grown up with the bush around me and spending my childhood playing in it, the outdoors feels like home. I always feel when I step out into nature a sense of calm and peace, Being the person I am I see things differently around me than the average person would. For me colours are always heightened, shapes are everywhere. Hard to explain but for example I look at a tree and I don’t just see a tree; I see the shapes it creates. I see negative spaces that create shapes and the positive spaces that create shapes. Textures, colours, shadows. It all comes rushing in my mind at once. I get an overwhelming rush of joy coming over me. I think that is probably the best way to describe it. It’s just how I view the world on a regular basis so when I go out on a journey discovering amazing new places I am in full explosion on the inside. A real rush, wonderment, and excitement for me. Each new landscape in front of me is a masterpiece being painted! Nature is an artist and really knows how to paint. Her choice of colours and textures is masterful.

Describe a particularly memorable exploration experience that sparked a significant artistic idea.

This is a hard one as there are many. I did however go through a sepia stage, especially after hiking through Alaska and was in a small one street town that felt like I stepped back into a western movie.

How does the act of exploring influence your creative process?

Nature is an amazing artist and really knows how to create. Nature’s choice of colours and textures is masterful. When I either hike or ride my senses are heightened by the sheer beauty around me. I tend to forget “life’s crap” and “routine” as we know it and immerse myself in the beauty before me. It is not just what one sees either, it’s all senses become alive and heightened. I often find when I’m hiking for weeks or months my senses are so alive, my hearing, my sight and smell are sharpened. So, when I look at a masterpiece before me, I just really get excited and want to recreate it by either painting or drawing it. Just like when someone is so inspired they must take a photo to capture that moment.

Can you share with us how your explorations evoke emotions that you express through your drawings.

The emotions I feel when I’m out on a journey are of feeling Alive, Real, Inspired, I really do get a tingling all over and that rush of excitement, like an adrenaline rush. So, when I’m drawing, I get those feelings flooding back!

Can you share a story where a specific emotional experience inspired a particular piece of art?

This one is hard as there have been many, though on one solo journey through Portugal is one forever etched in me. It was a day that was my worst and my best! I took a photo at that moment so that I could look back and remember the feelings. I later have used that photo many times in different promotion pieces for my business (Feed the Hike) and have drawn it for myself.

This was on my first day hiking from Lisbon, Portugal to Santiago, Spain. I was right on the outskirts of the city entering the rural area. It had been raining quite heavily for the past few days and there were many storms that had gone through, so the ground was soddened. I came to a rural area that took me through some swampy pathway. It was very slippery, muddy and the trail was narrow with swamp water on either side.

The mozzies were atrocious and felt like I was in a horror movie called “Attack of the Mozzies”. I had my hiking sticks in one hand and my buff in the other whooshing away the beasts as I raced through. This went on for nearly 5 kms. I came out the other side gasping for air, covered in mud and in full blown panic attack! I threw everything on the ground and screamed as loud as I could. I just kept screaming for help, then I stopped and looked around, no one was there! No houses! Nothing! I threw myself on the ground and just went ‘it's just you! No one is here to save you but you! I sat for I don’t know how long in silence just looking at my muddy legs and boots before me. I was ok and I took a photo of my legs and boots to remind me of that day and how I could be there for me! The story of this day does continue but it’s long. In the end I felt like it was a turning point for myself and my health that I should always embrace.

How has your exploration and artistic practice deepened your connection to nature?

The more I’m in Nature, the more I explore the more alive I feel! Doing my art pieces after just really brings back all that feeling of being alive!

What insights about the natural world have you gained through your drawings?

I feel looking at nature through an artistic eye you tend to notice more as in the finer details and how complex and incredible nature is.

Can you share a time when an exploration-inspired drawing led to personal growth or transformation.

I had a few that I have done. One is of me in the distance coming over the hill, alone with my pack on. The piece is done in sepia and has a very still, calm effect. Something that helps with my anxiety and inner strength.

How has the combination of exploration and artmaking enriched your life?

I truly believe it is my saviour. It’s my comfort place, my home. That is where I feel safe, alive, and excited. To relive it through my art means I get to feel this more especially if I am unable to be out there.

What advice would you give to aspiring explorer-artists who seek inspiration in the natural world?

My advice would be to just STOP, BREATH, and FEEL nature before you begin. Soak in what is around you and let your senses feel it. Your art will show it. Don’t force it.

Once you have completed a drawing, what do you usually do with them?

I sell my work, or hang it in my home, or just store it away for myself.

Any plans to start your own business or maybe sell some of your artwork?

I do as you would have read, sell my work. I do often get commissions to create a memory for someone else. I am re-creating a new platform for my work to sell as I am transitioning out of what I am currently doing and just looking for a simpler life. I will also write some more books; having written two prior I feel it might be time to write more.

Thank you, Michelle, for taking the time out of your day to inspire others. At this stage, you are welcome to add any additional information you feel the audience should know about yourselves or share additional stories.

I could share countless stories from my life and journeys as I’ve experienced a lot. I have travelled to many countries throughout the world and walked across them, sometimes 1, 2 or even 3 in a trip. I travel with others including my husband or solo. I have produced a Documentary on the Bibbulmun Track, written 2 books on hiking, The Capes Guidebook and Feed the Hike. Created my own dehydrated food company, Feed the Hike, and have a café on the Bibbulmun Track. Done many talks on the subject, have my own YouTube channel as well as I did have a website, though I have closed it down.

To continue following our explorer Michelle’s journey or simply want to reach out and say Hi, you can connect with Michelle on the following accounts:

(UPDATE: Since writing her story, Michelle has now sold Feed the Hike and The Trails Hub Cafe. These companies were huge achievements in her life; therefore, they are worth noting. Michelle is looking forward to the next stage of her journey.)

Facebook: Michelle Ryan (walkingtwobytwo), Walkingtwobytwo, Trails Hub Café, Feed the Hike.

Instagram: michelles._art, feed the hike, walkingtwobytwo, trailshubcafe. TikTok: @michelles._art, feedthehike, trailshubcafe.

YouTube: Walkingtwobytwo - @walkingtwobytwo7122.

Website:
http.//michelles-art.company.site